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For communication professionals, stress is unavoidable. It comes with the territory, complete with deadlines, competing priorities and demanding clients. We have jobs because someone has to deal with the stress. In fact, some would say that many of our kind thrive on stress and love the adrenaline rush that comes with it.
If that last statement is true for you, then you can stop reading. As the title of this article suggests, stress is a choice. We may not choose when and how a stressful situation makes its way to us, but we do determine how we will react to that stress. We decide whether or not we’ll walk around emanating a sense of calm or emulating a chicken with its head cut off. In fact, sometimes we feel stressed because we feel like we should be stressed. We’re creatures of bad habits and often mimic our peers more than we would like to admit. Our stress level may oddly connect to how busy or important we feel.
Dealing with stress is a decision. And it’s not a one-time decision; it’s one we make daily, perhaps even multiple times in a day. Every time a new stressor surfaces, we decide how to tackle it and what price we will pay in the process.
While we can’t completely eliminate stress from our lives, we can cut down on the physical and emotional distress that comes with it. The next time you find yourself facing a stressful situation or day, stop and ask yourself the following five questions.
1. Is the source of my stress internal or external? Stress is often self-created, and recognizing this is the first step to managing your emotions. Stop and think about what exactly is stressing you out. Is it truly your boss or your anticipation of what your boss might say? Is it the actual scope of the new marketing campaign you’re leading or the fact that you’re nervous about working on this kind of project?
2. What is in my control? Your internal stressors are likely within your control. Once you’ve recognized what part of your stress is self-created, you can take the reins and overcome the stress. Everything you do is within your control, so start there.
3. What can I change about this situation to make it less stressful? Once you know what’s in your control, it’s much easier to create a less stressful situation. You now know what you can change or omit altogether.
Oftentimes we stress ourselves out based on what we believe others want from us. If you need an extension on a deadline, ask for it. If you need to delegate a task or two, seek assistance. If you need a friend to talk to, pick up the phone. The worst that can happen is that your situation will not change. On the flip side, you may be able to avoid a whole lot of grief this way.
4. What can I omit or juggle to accommodate this one? You can indeed do it all, just not all at once. When it comes to combating general or overall stress, it is critical that you manipulate the various aspects of your life to complement, rather than conflict with, each other. Anticipating long hours at work? Cancel evening obligations. Have a sick child at home? Take a personal day rather than trying to work from home and play nurse. Juggling three social gatherings this weekend? Reschedule one.
5. How do I want to feel at the end of the day? Management expert Stephen Covey tells us to begin with the end in mind. That applies to more than concrete professional or personal pursuits. Stop to really think about how you want to feel at the end of any given day. In fact, think about how you want to feel during the day as well. As soon as you start feeling the manifestations of stress in your body, mind and emotions, take yourself back to this desired feeling.
If you truly believe that stress is a choice and dealing with it is a decision that you make, you are on your way to a less frenzied, more satisfying professional life. Embracing stress is not a part of a communicator’s job description. Applying this five-question formula could be the difference between breathing easy and hyperventilating. Given that, isn’t it worth a try?
Share your experience with this formula: Follow @CoachKamna on Twitter and share what worked.
R. Kamna Narain is an internal communication manager at McKesson Corporation in San Francisco. She is also a life coach, a board member of San Francisco/IABC and an extracurricular activity junkie. She makes decisions about how to deal with stress an average of two to four times a day. |
